Church #16. Community Bible Church. Easter Sunday 2014. 8762 155 St NW

Ok normally I wouldn’t say this, but don’t go here, just don’t go here. It’s bad, REAL BAD. Why you may ask… well your about to find out.

Easter Sunday traditionally involves a “sun rise service” which in Edmonton means that you will be looking at going to church around 6:30( no thank you) . I proceeded to arrive at 11am ( regular service time)  and walked in and  took a seat. The building and decor was old and outdated.  And the service was on a stage at the front of the room. It was kind of oddly set up with two small pianos on each side of it which two ladies played at the same time. Besides the podium being at their front of the stage, it looked like it was set up for filming 1980’s TV interviews! No joke, there were 4 wicker seats,  2 on each side angled perfectly as if there were cameras there, silk plants were placed strategically and everything! 

You get the idea :P The church had about 50 people, once again a full family mix, but that is due to the day. This church is defiantly made for an older crowd that doesn’t like change, but that is still no excuse for what happened at the end of the service.

I had a pleasant fellow sit down beside me, I’m guessing he is around 35-ish. I did think too much of it until he went up to the stage and sang in a full rich operatic voice. Did I mention he kind of looks like carrot top? :P  This was once again a church where you are expected to bring your own bible, and so this time I was going to have to go without.

One of the more odd things I noticed was the offering. I know they always have those little envelope things to put your money in, but I never do. I give one Lonny to each church nothing more nothing less, and I don’t hide it. They said a prayer to bless the offering and then two gentlemen walked to the back of the church with the plates, but they didn’t get passed up thru the crowd?? Needless to say they didn’t get a sheckle from me and I don’t regret it. It was the only church where they actually announced to the crowd that the donations go towards their missionary work overseas and in the city.

There one good thing that I heard that day. It was a humorous story about a German woman that was so hell-bent on the fact that Christ could not raise her from the dead, that she gave specific instructions to her relatives, that when she died that her grave be ultra-reinforced so that even if she was risen that there would be no way she could be removed from her grave.  In a great twist of irony I small seed found a tinny water crack in the marble slab and slowly over many years worked its way up and right thru the middle, cracked thru all the reinforcements and split the grave in two.  A great tree now stands over the grave that “could not be raised” :P

Ok, so it has been all happy sunshine rainbows up until this point. But that ends here.

There was a different speaker called up , a skinny man aprox 65 years old. He spoke with great vocal punch! ( seriously it was just like a TV show!). this person explained that he spend 2 months every year on Pakistan preaching the word of Christ to the local people ( this dude has to be crazy). But this is what got me. He started explain that the Muslims have a celebration where they  walk around Muhammad’s grave as to say “here is our great leader! He is here!” and then he exclaimed that “But their leader’s grave is a grave of defeat! Because he is still dead! Jesus’ tomb is a tomb of victory! Cause our savior lives and has triumphed over death!” I the crowd followed with a sound of agreement. Someone should have got a photo of my face when I heard that.

Congratulations Church #17 for being the first and hopefully last Edmonton church to encouraging religious intolerance. You blasphemous Pharisee loving, Paul quoting herd of goats! PUT THAT IN YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT DOUCHE-CANOES!

I’m not done. :P lol.

What you need to remember was the fact that this dude was not the head of the church he was just a speaker, and the other fellow up there (also of a similar age) seamed much more warm and friendly. So I decided I would direct my questions at this more inviting fellow.

 That was my 2^nd mistake. 

What seam start as an enjoyable conversation soon turned into a hour long argument. It was very clear that this fellow had a message for me. Or this is what I got the impression of.

#1. I will not find god by visiting other denominations and I am wasting my time.

Well I could spend my time just as well on You Tube and Pintrest right? :P

#2. If I worship in another temple then that is blasphemy!

Commit blasphemy… Check! Another thing off my checklist

#3.  I will never understand how to be a good Christian until I study the book of John inside and out and live by every word of it.

Bro, I’m only in the book of Joshua. Talk to me again in a year!  

#4. Nothing has ever been changed in the bible because the person that does it will suffer a fate worse than death!”

Do you seriously think there was not some Non-Christian ( or possibly even Christian) emperors in the past that didn’t give a rats ass, and was more than willing to tweak the bible to help control their Empire?  What the ancient illiterate population don’t know don’t hurt them right?

#5.  The King James bible is %100 the whole truth and nothing but the truth and every other translation and interpretation is wrong!

*face palm

After all this I shook his hand and told him straight up that I am never coming back. And marched out, but I guess what? I am not the only one! You know how they normally put prayer requests in the back of the pamphlet?  Well I went home and was looking thru them and I noticed there was also a note to pray that Gordon, Matthew and Nadine to “come back to the church”. All I have to say to those 3 is RUN! Just keep running! I hope you find what you are looking for! And more so, I hope you find the pure love that and joy which is the stuff that God is made of!

I need a drink, who’s got the wine?